What am I doing here in this endless winter?

Month

March 2011

My lips are sealed but still I scream.

As many of you know I’m Canadian and I try my best not to critique the English system, knowing myself the one back home is not the best (although it’s pretty damn near - joke by the way). Also, please note I understand that England does indeed have the better side of things and that we could be worse and we could be under a dictator but I digress.

I’m sick and tired of staying here screaming with my lips sewn shut. I am not blind and will not act this way anymore. The government controls people like me by forcing pills down our throats or needles in our skin. If I say I’m not mad it will only prove their hypothesis. So fucking what if I don’t conform in my behaviour to your society’s expectantions. The government just wants to slap a fucking label on you and I.

How can you expect to raise a a better generation? Our society is laying to waste. Kids are carrying guns, hitting crack and joining gangs as young as 12. They say they’ll do something about it but they do nothing.

RIGHT, let me explain what Canada’s like. They currently have a Conservative Prime Minister but with a liberal and alternative left parliament. We have rights for everyone there, wait except transexuals. WHAT?! I know right? Even my home country I can say I am ashamed of simply because of this. We have marriage and by marriage I mean you can get married to whoever you please at the age of consent (being 18 if I remember rightly), no matter what race, gender, religion and so on. Transexuals can marry but lo and behold it’s hard for divorces and they have next to no rape protecting rights. Fucking sick.

However, Canada has no National Debt. We fought in both World Wars and won some key battles we aided Britian and the other allies and managed all that with out bankrupting ourselves. No idea how but we did it. Canada has some of the lowest crime rate levels in the world and in their areas with them smallest police forces like Newfound Land they have the lowest crime rates.

England has a higher crime rate than all Canadian provinces together. Now what does that say? I’m a lady who’s very self assured, growing up in huge liberal cities do that to you, yet when it gets to the point where I can’t walk down the street wearing what I want or sit and watch the ducks without some youths harrassing me then it gets distrubing.

In Canada we have respect and leave people be. Yes we often consoul stranger who are weeping or physically upset in public. In England I’ve realised people harass others in public. It’s vulgar and obscence. I really don’t appreciate 13 year olds speaking in god knows what dialect of English blowing tobacco smoke in my face and asking me if I eat moose or I’ve seen I bear. Enough of the ethnic jokes please. I’m sick of them.

My aunt was mugged by a 14 year old boy a few months ago. Why? So he could buy some bread to feed his family. They couldn’t afford even bread. Yet the Conservatives continue to cut money for the poor, all the vital benefits are being scrapped or reduced. This country is going to waste.

I’ve been working for charity since I was 10. I remember a time when I was abused in everyway imaginable. I remember when we couldn’t afford bread and even at one point we were homeless. The English government refused to help us because we refused to denounce our citizenships. Last year through desperation we denounced our citizenships and gained - through a hard struggle - full English citizenships. I had to take twelve tests just to get that, including math. I can’t read numbers very well and I failed the tests twice. People look down on me because I’m an immigrant. When I was 10 I used to sit in a store watching the BBC and gruelingly practise the British accent to perfection. Why? So people wouldn’t bully me. I had to transfer three schools because of the bullying and it made me suicidal aged just fucking 8!

It’s things like this that plague me. We used to live seven of us in a two bedroom house in a rough area in a rough city. My mother has mental issues and my dad was always working on may I add minimum wage. This country metaphorically shit on people like us and continue to do so every second.

I am so fucking lucky to be able to sit here and type about my experiences on my - although second hand - laptop. I am grateful. So fucking grateful. I can never express my thanks to those that stood by me through the years when my parents couldn’t afford to heat the house and would dump us all on you. It was embarressing but a needed must.

No I must get back to my intial point. All the public cuts are further plummeting England into the concrete below. Soon, more families won’t be able to afford basic necessities and the crime rate will further elevate. We can’t afford education because the prices of universities are being raised. How can we get any jobs? The unemployment rate goes up, fuel goes up, cost of living goes up, higher education costs go up and yet the wage decreases.

David Cameron, you’re doing a public happiness test, right?

Well open your eyes and ears. Fucking listen to your people! My lips may be forever sealed in your opinion but I will from now on scream. Scream for a purpose. I’m not afraid.

Mar 29, 2011
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What are you doing tomorrow? xxxxx

Going to school =( Sorry it took so long to reply.

xxx

Mar 23, 2011
Hey there! I am Flapjack from The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack. Have you ever watched my show?

Ummm, no. I guess I’ll have to check it out right?

Mar 23, 2011
Mar 21, 2011
Mar 15, 2011105 notes
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